success measured by trousers
Today, I was absently-mindedly fidgeting as we were watching TV, and I realised I could take my wedding ring off, without the aid of soap, oil, or an angle grinder.
I've been able to slide it up and down to the knuckle for a while recently, which itself was progress over it previously being an immovable object. It had got close to finger garrotting before, but today was the first time I could finally slip it on and off at will since J put it on at the wedding.
This is not a revelation about the ending of my marriage by the way, or indeed the admittance that I'm trying to hide that I'm married in some wild and misguided mid-life (ahem!) crisis event. It's just a marker of how much weight I've managed to get rid of in the last few months.
For a long while J has been nagging me to sort out the contents of my wardrobes. I'd been keeping clothes that I no longer fitted into, based on the optimism of being able to fit into them again at some undefined point in the future.
Don't worry, J said, it's age, you inevitably get a bit bigger and, you know... saggier. (Was there any need for that? Cruel.)
I didn't believe that and determined to Do Something About It. So I've been exercising as regularly as I can for months now, MS and heart permitting, and being a lot more careful with my diet.
Some trousers had been hanging in there unworn for years. One or two pairs had missing waistband buttons, as witness to the day that admitting to myself they were too small for me was finally here.
Happily, I now fit into a lot of those too small clothes, and have sewn new buttons back on some trousers. My choice of shirts, T-shirts and jackets has also become wider – as I have become less so. (Don't worry, there will not be any photographs as proof.)
I do have some clothes left that are still too small for me. I can still aim to be able to get into a few of the cycling jerseys I used to wear and have kept, misty-eyed at remembering where and when I finally realised that 'overstuffed sausage' was not a good look and I should buy bigger ones now.
Occasionally I try one on. I am normally staggered that I was obviously this size once, as I stand there in front of the mirror wearing a cycling jersey for a hat.
There's a long way to go before the smallest end of me-sized clothes ceases to be under threat from J wielding the charity shop bag. But the largest ones are now as well.
I am currently at my lower end (but not my lowest ever) size range. Yay me. But perhaps I should let her now remove the too big for me stuff.
It'll warn me to start getting a grip if I find myself needing to buy new larger trousers again.
Written by a real person.
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